March 11th, 1492

I laid away staring at the stars tonight. My father use to tell me about them. Mary asked me who wants to die alone? I do. I don’t want to have anybody stuffer from the pain of my death. But I am too greedy to leave Mary and Philip. I love them. I am already dead inside. They just do not know it. So I laid awake and stared at the stars, wondering who I am, who I was, who I am to be? And most of all, when will evil win my life? Will I get my revenge before then? I pray I do. But I don’t know who it is I pray to anymore. I think I am far from being saved…